We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Of course I have a pirate flag
you made out with another girl for some wings
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
A bitchslap is in order.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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