Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
