Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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