airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I need moral support for this bender
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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