I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're using joints as your birthday candles
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I'm always down for nudity.
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