im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize