the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
