he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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