we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
