I think im going to throw up on grandma
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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