When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
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Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize