How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
