Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
