found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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