I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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