You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
