Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
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