But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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