You're so nebulous sometimes
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
