I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize