at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Actions speak louder than pants.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
