But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
