new low.... made out with someone while peeing
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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