your room smells of hookers.
And success
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize
