I'm lost and stupid without you.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I supernannyed him into submission
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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