guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize