the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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