I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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