Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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