ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
