Moan for me like Helen Keller
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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