thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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