Hey man sorry I got all grabby
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
