So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
