My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize