I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
