Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Sext me about skeletons
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
