Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Randomize
