glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
