Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
it was like eating out sand paper
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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