Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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