Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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