she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Randomize
