ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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