Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
