I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
