No period for spring break; use this wisely.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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