So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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