ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
