I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
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