i don't like sucking hair
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Randomize