So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
she was so not down for the gang bang
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
