Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I will be naked everywhere
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize